Life lessons from golf

I'm sitting here watching golf .....Saturday afternoon, Dave is taking a nap after 5 hours of driving to Vegas, and it did give me pause to think about what I have learned from golf.  I've always been a competitor and athletic so taking a little white ball out of my pocket and hitting the shit out of it was not hard.  Sometimes I've even imagined the little white ball had a name...like "Patricia" (my last and worst manager at WF).

In the corporate world, there was very little coorperation amongst women.  We could have easily been the strongest contingent and taken over leadership with no problem...if only we had supported each other.  Instead, it was always a competition, how can I one up that one?  Why?  Because we were practicing the age old how can I fuck you over and get your job or your husband or house...aka...solidify my security.  Golf....when we gals play together..."great shot", even though it may suck!  Who cares, we are going to support and lift each other up!  "Keep your head down" And lots of other advice....all taken with love and understanding! You also learn about character.  Who lies, who cheats, who just says "I'm showing up to play today...I have no idea how I will do".  It's ok.  We just want to spend a few hours in your company.  You also see good sportsmanship.  Hey, I will swear with the best of them but I don't throw clubs! And patience! A hard lesson for me! And forgiveness...depending upon the person, another hard lesson for me! And so many of the life issues that you have 5 hours to talk with your trusted friends about.  It is a confidence builder to stand up in front of a little white ball, know your capacity that day, choose the right club (making the right choices), set up, shape your shot and tee it up at just the right height, fix your`stance and finally wait for the "ping"!  But what is it really about?  The same things that carry us through the other parts of life....experience, skill, knowledge, self confidence and hard won battle scars.

And the best part...men just look at you when you pull up in your cart with this unbeleiveable confusion.  Apparently they have not hear that there is no longer a "ladies day" where that's the only day ladies can play.  My firend and I played this past week and we had a twosome in front of us. They "declined' to play with women.  I've always been intimidated to play with men.  What I learned is they were more intimidated to play with us....who knew because we're funny and cute!

Austin..get a grip!

I don't have kids.  Do not know the ups and downs, certainly have my opinions, but have not had to live the day to day, the responsibility, the worry.

My nephew has decided that he is dropping out of high school, 3 months before the end of his last year.  He says he is tired of getting up at 6:30am, (hell, I got tired of getting up at 4:30am to go to work but that was what was required) school is boring, he doesn't care about taking "the walk" to receive his diploma.  I asked him "why" about all of this and his answer was "because".  That's not an answer. Then I asked him what he planned to do with himself.  No answer..."I need a break".  A break from what?  You're 18!

Of course, I'm beside myself!  Education is of paramount importance to me.  You can barely get a decent job with a high school diploma today!  His plan is to get his GED.  I asked him why, since he hates school, would he rather study for his GED and take a test.  Well, according to him, he has it covered.  Then I asked what his future plans were.  He had just emailed me that he had his college plans lined up.  Well, not so much.  He says he wants to be a physical therapist. When I mentioned that would require school, which he apparently hates, there was a moment of "oh shit".  And then I asked what next...no specific answers.

It pains me to see someone I love make choices that will have long term effects.  I know at 18, there is little thinking about the future, it's just about today. At some point, real life will slap him in the face!  WTF, it did for all of us!  Some of us were just better prepared!

Austin, and I'm telling you this with all my love, stay in school, man up, get your diploma and then decide what to do next.  I know things suck right now, believe me, they could be worse!  You have two parents who love you, you have a roof over your head, you have food in the refrigerator, you have friends, you have family, you have clean clothes, fresh water, milk, you have unlimited opportunities ahead of you - unless you choose to limit yourself.

Mom

Mom has been the constant.  I don't know many who could have faced the challenges she has and still come out of the other end, just as strong, just as positive, just wanting more life!  Two rounds of cancer, 7 stents, living alone for 25 years and now more residual from the chemo. She has been our source of frustration and admiration.  At 3 days old I was delivered into her arms, adopted, wanted and loved. Six weeks later, along came Michael. And I can tell you, if you ever knocked on her door at 3am, she would open it, cook for you and tell you to stay as long as you needed to.  If I called her today and said that I would be there and needed her help she would figure it all out before I got there! I see the signs...aging, not eating, she is giving up a bit.  

Daddy bought our plots on the roof garden at Glen Haven in 1964. I laid him to rest in 1990 and the road ahead is now with Mom. We will all be together.

I'm glad I will have some time in FL to spend my family!